Okay I know all of us do not use the term HOH. But I had to use it for the title to get my point across.
I thought it would be fun to list a few words or sayings that the men in our DD/ttwd – lives like to use.
Please note that some of them came straight out of my husband’s mouth but others I read in stories as well. Or maybe in some of your blogs, who knows ;).
First lets start with the ones my own husband said before:
Me: (text him) “Love, my phone’s battery is already showing red. (I forgot to charge it the night before)
He: (replied) “So will your ass be tonight”
He sat in the bath one night and I was sitting next to the bath chatting with him, but I was in one of my moods so he said out of the blue “okay so the mistake of letting your stressful week end up into a bad mood is on me, unfortunately for you it will also end up on your butt.”
Oh and what about the famous “Alright, come with me” I am sure all of us heard that one before.
There is one I hate with every fibre of my being “go get the wooden spoon and come back here” Ugh! first of all I HATE the wooden spoon and secondly to ask me to go get the thing I hate is just torture.
“Go wait for me in our room, please…… in your spankable position” Which normally means that I will not get a warm up or be over his knee at all for this one.
“I will have to help you focus again, we will handle it tonight, make sure you are done with everything early tonight” (I get that one a lot, via a text message)
“My love, do you need a stress reliever?” (with a kiss in my neck) Oh, I love those!!
“hey” (with just a stern look and only I know what he meant)
“I am going to spank the living daylights out of you” (oh you don’t want those! They are the scary and angry ones)
Then there are others I have read about before:
A confession over the phone ended like this:
He: “Okay honey, I am on my way home. Bye”
She: “Goodbye, honey”
He: “Oh and honey…”
He: “Sit…while you still can”
An aftercare one:
“My dear, I will love you ’till you can’t sit down”
A respond to her begging for his mercy:
“Oh, not as sorry as you are going to be in a few moments”
He: “the only butt you should be concerned about… is yours”
Oh, and the promising ones like:
The lecturing ones:
“why I am I doing this?”
“will you do it again?”
“have I made myself clear?” (off coarse by then he has defintely made himself crystal clear and you will promise him the sun, moon and stars as well)
“what have you learned from this” (uhmmmmm, don’t get caught or you will be spanked. Lol! just joking;)
When he did something wrong and was making up with her.
He: “so am I forgiven?”
She: (trying to play her cards right for the next time she is in trouble) “Sure honey, since you always forgive me”
He: “yeah, after I spank your ass” (okay, that did not go as planned;)
So there, hope you had fun reading this. Please add more if you have others. I would love to read about them.