The story of my rock (part three)

The meaning of my husband’s name is ROCK. How perfect it fits into what he has done for me and what he is for me. He has always  been the stable, unshakable ground underneath me. My rock.


You see our life together was not always a fairy tale. We had many, many obstacles to overcome. Many trials, hurt and losses to bear and work through. My parents did not approve of my relationship with him. Typical story of the bad boy that captured an innocent naive girl’s heart. Well that is what everybody thought. When you first meet him you will most probably not like him at first. He is quiet and looks like a grumpy guy.  But give him time, soon you will see how his eyes will make little wrinkles to go with his smile. You will not always like what he has to say, but he is honest. He does not lie and he does not sugar coat anything. He is straight forward and sometimes too honest for my liking. He is a very good judge of character and will very quickly tell me if I shouldn’t trust someone or to be careful. He does not keep quiet when something is unfair or wrong. He will fight for anyone if he feels it is necessary. If he promised something he WILL do it. If he can he will always help. He does not care what people think and he will tell you also. He is a perfectionist, planning and organizing is his middle name. (very annoying sometimes)

These good characteristics of him makes him very unpopular sometimes. My parents were the first people in my life that had to deal with his honesty. For a long time he had to proof himself in many different ways. He is not easily intimidated and could not be put off. Today he is always there to help my parents and assist them with anything he can help with. He forgave them, but the scars are there. They know they made a mistake and they have to respect the boundaries he has put in place. They broke his trust and I cannot blame him for the way he feels. Some of my family members plotted behind my back arranging blind dates for me. Oh boy, what a confusing time for me. My heart was holding onto him, the one I loved but my head wanted to follow everybody’s opinions.

After two and half years of school and four years in university without him there. He worked and studied, I studied full time in another town. We have survived it all. Not once did I feel I want to quit. We did break up once to see if we are meant for each other. Also a silly decision because I was influenced by others. It felt as if I was dying, I couldn’t bear it longer than three weeks then I was back in his arms. The only reason it took this long was because I was on holiday with a few friends for 3 weeks and there on the beach I decided that the only fear I do have was do be without him, caused by people who think they know what is best for me. The same day I arrived back from holiday I ran into his arms and promised him that I will never leave him again. I didn’t. There are too many stories to tell about the challenges we had to face. We have conquered them together. He never changed, he never doubted our love no matter what people said. He was the solid ground of our relationship. My rock.

We were baptized together in our church, we attended young adult groups togehter at churh and we grew together and stronger each day.

You see he is not the kind of man who winks at girls, but he did it for me.

He is not the kind of man who arranges a weekend behind my back with a photographer friend to propose to me on a beautiful ROCKY beach, but he did it for me. The moment I said yes, rain started pouring over us as we kissed, another “movie moment”. I remember running back to our car trying to look at my ring but it was raining too much to see it properly.


He is not the kind that would pick me up at our gate after I was away for five days and carry me “bridal style” to our bedroom, but he did for me.

He is not very romantic by nature, but is for me. He always says it is because of me.


I remember so many things from our life together, too many to share them all. I remeber the first day I had to go to university. He was there helping me to take my things to my dorm room. I was unpacking my things when suddenly he bent down in my cupboard with a scoop and a brush cleaning the floor before he unpacked my shoes. We were both quiet, me because of fear to be without him and this new chapter in my life and he because he is leaving his girl between all these other guys for four years. But he did, because he knew what was best for me. I remember me climbing in my cupboard to secretly phone him with a friend’s cellphone because we were not allowed to have phones during the first three weeks of orientation. I cried and asked him to come fetch me, I told him that I don’t  want to be here anymore. He said “no baby, I am not coming to get you, you have to finish this. Because you can, be strong and finish what you have started”. He told me afterwards that he was so close to get in his parents’ car to go and fetch me. But he forced himself to stay strong.

I remember the gentle way he held our baby daughters for the first time, with that eyes that smile with his lips.

I remember the way he had to carry his sick father to the bath a week before he died.

I remember the first time he prayed in front of me, which was a huge challenge for him.

I remember the first time we made love,I was still a virgin. We were both so unsure and careful. LoL, not anymore!



4 Comments Add yours

  1. Meredith says:

    Your story is lovely and I sincerely hope you are not finished.


    1. hisjoli says:

      Nope, part three coming soon. 🙂


  2. ZBG says:

    What a great love story. It’s good you stuck to your instinct and didn’t let your parents influence you. He sounds solid and I’m glad you have him. ❤


    1. hisjoli says:

      Thanks ZBG,
      I am glad I have him too ;).


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